Aren't You Dead?
by blue alien
Summary: Galadriel and Boromir must go on a quest to find out why Boromir is still alive. But they aren't exactly a perfect traveling couple. R&R! PLEEZ!


Disclaimer: I hate these things, they are sooooo annoying, but I guess I really don't have a choice. If I really owned LOTR, then I would be relaxing on a beach some where, sipping a tequila(actually that would be underage drinking, so more along the lines of iced tea or lemonade), tanning myself. *this she says as she sips her tequila.umm..iced tea* Just kidding, the point is I am pretty much broke and I definitely do not own LOTR, so just hurry up and get on with reading my fanfic. Not that I would ever mean to insult any potential reviewers. PLEEZ PLEEZ PLEEZ REVIEW ME!!!  
  
It was a pleasant afternoon in Minas Tirith, as Galadriel and Boromir strolled through the paths of Boromir's garden.  
  
"Isn't this wonderful, Galadriel? I think that is surely the most wonderful garden in the world" said Boromir lazily as he seated himself on a bench.  
  
But Galadriel remained standing, and looked down on her Boromir sternly.  
  
"Boromir, you have made an unquestionable mistake. Everyone in Middle Earth knows that the gardens of Lothlorien are fairest and most wonderful of them all. With their graceful sweeping mallorn trees, and the lush green vegetation everywhere you look, the Valar destined it to be so"  
  
"So they all may think, yet in my heart I know that Minas Tirth can grow more beautiful and luscious plants, and that their fair gardens by far surpass those of Lothlorien"  
  
"Oh yeah? Well, I never see any mallorn trees in YOUR gardens. Plus, our gardens grow fair food fit for the fair elves, while Minas Tirith's meals are from fields elsewhere in Gondor. We have beauty, yet we know how to provide for ourselves" Galadriel shot back.  
  
"Well, somebody's a bit stingy today. You were the one who chose to come to Minas Tirith. We could have met in Lothlorien if you had preferred" replied Boromir  
  
"So you think. Well, I had a very long talk with your father, and we didn't discuss the right way to plant a daisy!"  
  
"Ah yes, father always has preferred marigolds. You notice there are never any daisies in the gardens of Minas Tirith"  
  
"Fool! It was an expression! The point is that Denethor insisted that I remain in Gondor! I couldn't go back to Lothlorien unless you insisted. You are such a spoiled little brat!" yelled Galadriel  
  
"Brat! Yeah right! Every girl that I ever court has always loved me! I just haven't been able to find the right one. I thought you were THE ONE, but no, I was obviously mistaken!"  
  
"Look little kid, I may as well set your priorities straight! Not everyone loves you! Heck, half the population of Gondor probably hates you. They don't dare say anything because they don't want to anger your father! And you know who hates you the most? ME!!!"  
  
Boromir looked shocked.  
  
"Ha-ha-half the po-po-poulation hates me? That's n-n-not fair. I'll tell fa- fa-father on you!" wailed Boromir loudly.  
  
"Oh jesus, this kid really is a hot air balloon. Celeborn tried to warn me, but hey, I would never listen to him anyways. He's just trying to keep me from traveling too far away from Lothlorien. The poor guy never learned how to cook, but he's too embarrassed to mention it to the servants. He's proably dining on lembas bread. Or maybe he bought some hotdogs and is toasting them over the fire. I forgot to tell him that it takes about 7 hours to cook one that way. Oh well" muttered Galadriel to herself  
  
Boromir continued to wail and cry for all he was worth (which isn't much), while Galadriel sat and thought. She finally stopped thinking about hot dogs and Celeborn's lack of cooking skills, when she suddenly realized something important.  
  
"Boromir, why are you here? I thought you were dead" asked Galadriel gently.  
  
"Uh-uh-I dunno. Father probably reincarnated me" whined Boromir tearily.  
  
"Yeah right. Were you ever really dead?"  
  
"Well duh! Gosh, ya think I just pretended to be dead and ran off to live with the mountain goats? I really don't remember"  
  
"Oh my god, this is pathetic. Varda, where are you when I need you?" muttered Galadriel to herself as she looked to the sky.  
  
"Maybe we should go ask your dad. This could be interesting. If men can be reincarnated whenever they die, what's the fun in being an elf?"  
  
"Naw, lets not. He's always busy, and plus, who really cares? The important thing is that I'm alive, right?" said Boromir lightly.  
  
"Actually, that's the bad thing. As soon as I discover how you were brought back to life, I want to ruin the process as much as I can. That way when I murder you, I won't have to worry about ever talking to you again!" answered Galadriel cheerily. The thought of murdering some one she hated cheered her up considerably.  
  
"Oh...hey, wait a second! You're going to murder me?" asked Boromir, but it was too late. Galadriel had run off in search of Boromir's father.  
  
"Oh gee. The last thing I want to do is run around my own city in search of a High Elf that I truly hate. But she is my guest, and father would want me to be a good host" thought Boromir.  
  
He sighed wearily, then whistled.  
  
Two servants approached leading Boromir's horse. The prince mounted, and set off in search of Galadriel.  
  
It was growing dark, and Boromir could only hope that she might trip and fall.  
  
Elves could die from a good blow to the head, right?  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
hope you liked!!!!  
  
I was going to have this be a fic about hopeless lord of the rings couples, but I ended up with this instead.  
  
R&R!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEEZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 


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